Parenting Attachment Styles: Which are you?

  • By: Maya
  • Date: April 5, 2022
  • Time to read: 3 min.

Parenting styles are typically determined by how attached a person is to their parent(s). There are three primary parenting styles: authoritarian, authoritative, and neglectful. Each parenting style has its own set of benefits and drawbacks. It can be difficult to determine which parenting style is right for you, but by understanding your attachment style, you can better adapt your parenting style to meet your child’s needs.

The different parenting styles

Parenting styles are a big deal. They can have a large impact on the development and well-being of children. Different parenting styles can be classified according to their attachment style. There are three main types of attachment: secure, insecure, and ambiguous/disorganized.

Secure attachment is the most common type of parenting style. A child who is securely attached to their parents feels comfortable and safe in their presence. They know that they can rely on their parents for support and protection. This type of attachment is usually seen as healthy.

Insecure attachment is the second most common type of parenting style. A child who is insecurely attached to their parents may feel fearful or anxious around them. They may also experience bouts of separation anxiety. This type of attachment can be harmful, however, if it leads to feelings of stress or guilt in adulthood.

The four attachment styles

Parenting attachment styles have been classified into four groups: Secure, Anxious-Preoccupied, Dismissive, and Avoidant. It’s important to understand each style in order to create the best environment for your child. 

Secure parents are typically calm and accepting of their children, providing them with consistent love and support. They are likely to be responsive when their children need emotional reassurance. Anxious-Preoccupied parents often feel overwhelmed by their child’s needs and try to take on too many responsibilities. This can lead to frustration and conflict in the family. Dismissive parents tend to ignore or reject their children completely, which can lead to feelings of shame and insecurity in the child. Avoidant parents are typically very reluctant to attach emotionally to either themselves or their children. This can cause a child difficulties in forming close relationships later in life.

How to identify your parenting style

Parenting styles are complex and can be different for every family. However, there are some general characteristics that most parenting styles share. One common parenting style is the helicopter parent. These parents are constantly hovering and monitoring their children, which can lead to children feeling overwhelmed and inadequate. Other common parenting styles include the authoritarian parent and the permissive parent. The authoritarian parent is very demanding and expects absolute obedience from their children, while the permissive parent does not discipline their children harshly enough and allows them to run wild. Parents who use a combination of these two styles are often known as ‘moderate’ parents.

The benefits of understanding your parenting style

Parenting styles are important to understand as they can impact how children fare in their development. There are four main parenting styles: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful. Each style has its own set of benefits and drawbacks that parents should be aware of before adopting a particular style.

Authoritative parenting is the most effective style for developing self-discipline and good habits in children. It provides clear guidelines and expectations, sets boundaries, and provides consistent reinforcement. Children who are raised in an authoritative household are more likely to have strong academic skills, show leadership qualities, and make strong relationships. However, authoritative parents can be demanding and strict, which may cause children to rebel or develop low self-esteem.

Authoritarian parenting is similar to authoritative parenting in that it provides clear guidelines and expectations but is less demanding.


In conclusion, parenting attachment styles are important to understand. They can help you to understand yourself and your relationships better. They can also help you to understand how to best interact with your children. If you are interested in finding out more about parenting attachment styles, there are many resources available to you. Thank you for reading!

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